It was the best day ever. Filled with insane emotions. Over the last few days, I have been confronted with some interesting facts about myself and about CR. I struggle with Christians. I don’t trust Christians. If you have read this blog for more than one day, you probably know this. I have a really hard time being emotionally present at church. Really not known as a bright, cheery person there or in my small group. Maybe as directly the opposite.
A joke was cracked that while we pray to God to be “reasonably happy” people in the serenity prayer, we best be better than reasonably happy people if we want anyone to come to CR. It is so hard for me to be happy or emotionally available to Christians or at church. I was emotionally available today, so I ended up crying on a bathroom floor. I also ended up having a lot of fun.
I got to teach my favorite lesson today – Crossroads. I love it. When you are wrong, promptly admit it.
So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God. – Matthew 5:23-24
And now I think I am going to go have a good cry because apparently this life is just too much for me. I am learning to have fun again.
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