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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

U could see

I was sitting on a park bench this evening, eating a sandwich and feeling inspired. It was easy to be inspired eating outside on a nice day in the midst of a long winter. I had just finished my final Saturday class where we studied how the Church could effectively reach “the nations” in the city. He had sent us out with Revelations 5:9 ringing in our ears “You [Jesus] are worthy to take the scroll and break its seals and open it. For you were slaughtered, and your blood has ransomed people for God from every tribe and language and people and nation.”

I sat on a bench in Manhattan and watched the people around me. Since the day about six weeks ago when I started to pray specifically for the people I saw on the streets around me, the way I view my city has changed. I see individual persons instead of crowds of stress.

I began to text a friend some thoughts to record them. It is a thing I do when I do not want to publicize twitter length comments, but want to remember them later. “What if I actually had a vision?” I asked. “What if I didn’t think the Great Commission was hypothetical [intended for others and not applicable on a grand scale to my life]?” “What if I actually believed?”

She answered my first barrage of questions with three words. “U could see.” I looked around. Yes, I would be able to see. What would I see behind all these faces if I had a vision? My questions continued until I eventually made it to “What if I viewed all the unbelievers in my life as someone who might start a world revolution if only they knew the gospel?” What if I saw tremendous potential in everyone I met? What if I believed anyone could be the next John Wesley or George Whitefield and be used to spark a revival across the world? How would that change the way I witnessed? How would that change the conversations I have with people around me?

I was “accused” of being an idealist today, which I found funny since I have begun to conclude I often am somewhere between a brutal realist and a pessimist. But the comment made me think, and I texted, “We will never accomplish God’s purposes with realism because they [God’s purposes] are not realistic.”

I think if I want to be used for a purpose greater than myself, I will need to have a vision outside the realm of human realism. Human realism will confine me to a life of depravity and sameness. Human realism will prevent change and tie me to my past. Human realism will kill God’s vision for my life. But I know more is real because He has already brought me to a place where most people who knew me twenty years ago, would have said was entirely impossible, improbable and unlikely.

On a more personal recovery themed note, I thought a lot today about where my identity is. Is my first identity as a member of God’s family? What would change if it was?

A lot.

This is what the LORD of Heaven’s Armies, the God of Israel, says to all the captives he has exiled to Babylon from Jerusalem: “Build homes, and plan to stay. Plant gardens, and eat the food they produce. Marry and have children. Then find spouses for them so that you may have many grandchildren. Multiply! Do not dwindle away! And work for the peace and prosperity of the city where I sent you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, for its welfare will determine your welfare.” – Jeremiah 29:4-7


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