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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

This little light of mine

I received the unexpected blessing of forgetting to set my alarm last night. I slept all the way until 7:20 and had to hurry to be to church by 8:10. Where was the blessing? There really was not one except to know my feelings are not near as raw in the mornings now as they were a month ago when a similar event occurred. I made sure to at least open my Bible app and read the daily verse before leaving.

On the way, I prayed fervently for God to change the story from the last time this had happened. He changed my story. I managed to quite enjoy the men in my life today. Even the ones I saw in the early morning. In spite of having a crazy emotional dream. I am glad God changes stories.

I am glad God changes stories because I figure if I am ever going to get married someday I am going to have to be able to see a man before I speak to Jesus in the morning. It would be terribly impractical not to be able to do so. I am really glad God is healing me because I am really beginning to like these species of living things called men. They are beginning to seem nearly human.

This afternoon the “flashlight” on my iPhone decided to rebel. I had never even used it before. It just randomly decided to turn on. Apparently according to the limited info on the internet, it may be in a permanent state of rebellion. It even stays on when the phone is off. How super annoying is that? Arguing with it was beginning to ruin my day when suddenly it struck me that I have taped phones together and used them, why was I letting a phone control my day? So I have decided to look at the bright side and let this little light of mine shine until I see the light and find a solution. My momentary solution is a bright red sticker that says “You did it!” over the light so it is not so bright. I did it!

I spent some time answering some of the step study questions for this week. I have discovered I am definitely afraid of freedom. I am not sure why other than because it is an unknown entity. I think I am afraid of all the feelings that come with it. I have always been afraid of losing control of my feelings. But I think those are only some of the reasons I am afraid. I am not quite sure of the real ones, the deep ones. I am going to need much more time to talk to God about those.

This morning’s message was essentially about storing up treasure in heaven. It made me wonder, are the treasures we store in heaven people?

Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be. – Matthew 6:19-21

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