Estoy muy cansada. Can I just say that? Today must have been better than yesterday. The big difference is that I was alone in the bathroom with a bug yesterday morning, and I was almost crying because of it. This morning I was alone in the bathroom showering with a bug and was laughing hysterically because of it. Much more my typical reaction. Though to be fair the bug yesterday morning was a lot scarier. This morning it was just a moth. Yesterday it was a flying beetle and half the people on this trip are even scareder of the flying beetles than I am. I am not very scared of them, but I am a little. I don’t like the idea of one flying around in an unpredictable manner while I am in the shower.
Another thing put me in a brilliant mood this morning. I was listening to the song “Able” while in the said shower. This might have contributed to my early morning revelry. I accidentally had the song on repeat. One of the lines is “though I think I’m strong enough to do this in my own, I’m not able.” That made me giggle hysterically. I don’t think I am able to do it on my own. Most of the things I get upset about are because I have to do things on my own. I know I need God, and I know I need community. I may be tired of being needy some days, but I have passed the point of thinking I am not needy. I think. Otherwise, the day was good. I got a little shaky. Maybe from the heat? So I drank a bunch of Gatorade. It does seem that I may be having more stomach issues in the near future. But I can’t imagine you really want to read about that. I am really missing my groups back home. They do add a lot of stability to my life. I miss the people. I miss knowing how they are right now. I miss watching them grow and change and hear what God is doing in their lives. I don’t want to go home today, and I will even be sad to leave on Friday.
I both really miss my routine and am glad to be away from it. I have only gotten glad for a break from it in the last few hours. Though to be honest, right now I just want to go to bed. Not literally anywhere. But I bet I will sleep like a log tonight. Speaking of logs, I think God is working on taking an entire tree out of my eye right now. I am not being very cooperative. I apparently like to try to see through trees. It is mostly an obscure experience. That is all for now.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)
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