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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

Praise Him

Right now my heart is tender. I am in pain. I am not sure why this is my reaction to the events of this evening. Tonight I praised Him. Someone just so happened to ask me what those adversities God brought me through were. What was the cause of joy or something like that. Anyways, I went on a whole rant praising Him because this week He has been encouraging me with how much I have changed. How different I am. How my knee-jerk reactions are no longer the same.

But as I walked into the door tonight I felt like I had painted my growth stronger and bigger than it was. I know in my head I did not. Only in writing might I be able to truly convey how much I have changed. I am not as good with the spontaneous spoken word. At least I do not think so. Writing that all out already makes me feel better.

Can you believe with all the struggle I have had over money in the last two and a half (thirty) years, I actually have begun to feel truly incredibly wealthy in the last few weeks? This is a change I did not think to celebrate tonight until my turn for sharing had passed. How incredibly awesome is God? I hope I can continue to surrender my will for His. It all comes down to whether I am willing to allow Him to provide for me in His way or whether I insist it be my way. I am miserable when I try it my way. I am also miserable when I fight for life to be my way.

I rearranged my whole room today in an attempt to make it more homey. I moved my bed. I am having some anxiety over it because the place I have my God time has now changed. Isn’t that weird? She who had no home, now is disturbed by which corner of the room she sleeps in? I guess in some way it is almost a celebration to have allowed myself to stay somewhere long enough to become a creature of habits other than addiction or habitual change.

But you belong to God, my dear children. You have already won a victory over those people, because the Spirit who lives in you is greater than the spirit who lives in the world. – I John 4:4

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