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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

Nothing to Lose

Over the last few weeks, I have been asking myself the question: Would it be worth laying down my entire life, will and desire for Jesus if only one person would be changed through my sacrifice?

As someone who differs strongly on points of faith with my family of origin, I have given up a lot to follow Jesus in the way I feel He has called me to follow Him. I have had to say goodbye to a comfortable relationship with my family, my career, some of my hobbies, and a comfortable income.

I have been wondering if it is worth it. What constitutes being used in the lives of other people anyway? Do I have to be their final step in their journey to finding Christ for it to “count”? Does it mean merely helping someone have a better day and giving them no spiritual encouragement whatsoever? What if I was the world’s worst evangelist, would it count if I helped other followers of Jesus grow in their walk with Him?

As I think of some of the people who are close to me, both believers in Jesus and people who do not follow Him, I think the answer is yes. It would be worth being used to change one person’s life. When I put a face and name on it, the answer is yes.

Naturally, there is a lot of personal benefit from taking up my cross and following Jesus. Often it is really painful. Dying to oneself is not easy, but I think I have found it worth it. Recovery is really, really hard. I have no idea how I will make it to the other side of the next three or four months. Tonight I am joyful; but overall, I struggle to see the light at the end of this tunnel.

But I am going to celebrate the victories of the last few days. The victory that as my day progresses I become more joyful and more hopeful. I am sure I have not actually laid it all down for Jesus, but right now I am feeling like I have already lost everything. What more do I have to lose? What will I gain? What can I gain?

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul? For the Son of Man will come with his angels in the glory of his Father and will judge all people according to their deeds. – Matthew 16:24-27


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