I love God more than anything else on this earth, but today there is a price to following Him. He brings incredible blessings into my life, but part of me winces at the sacrifice and wonders if following Him is worth it. The other part of me knows a more intimate relationship with Him is more than enough reward for any sacrifice I must make.
I must be growing. I now cry around people more than I cry alone. I cried a decent amount today. I am fine except when I talk of anything real then I start crying. Today I know following God is worth it. In my head I know it pays off even from a temporal standpoint. But my emotions weep and wonder if it is worth it this time. It does not feel like all things work together for good right now.
God continues to be incredibly good to me. Step 9 is closer to done than it ever has been. My faith is in Him alone. I have no other object to place my trust in anyway. My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
There is so much hope in God. My only reward is Him.
If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. – Matthew 16:25