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Writer's pictureLaura Kae

Hoping because I am experiencing

Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been told you from the beginning? Have you not understood since the earth was founded? – Isaiah 40:21

Our God is an awesome God. He sits enthroned in the heavens. The earth is His foot stool. He rules. He reigns. He says He’s coming back again. I know He will. All the earth will sing His praises. He is able. He is willing to forgive. He is my God. Early I will seek Him.

This morning I did a H-E-A-R-T check as I walked home from my first job. I have not done one in a week or two. Am I Hurting? Yes, still hurting. Am I Exhausted? So exhausted I have no idea how I will finish my walk home. Am I Angry? I do not know. I am too exhausted to care. Am I Resentful? Too tired to know. Tense? Not really, just want to dissolve into my bed in a sea of tiredness. But I took a 20 minute nap and my day changed for the better. Prayer and sleep will do wonders.

Tonight was Step Study. It was on hope. Step 2: “We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” Oddly, over the course of the last week since I filled out the participant’s guide on Saturday, I have come to believe God can heal me. I am sure I will doubt at some point in my future, but tonight I want to be glad I can believe.

Less than a week ago, I came home from step study convinced I could never change or heal to a semblance of health on this side of heaven. I think it may be a stretch to say what I have tonight is faith, but I do know this: There is a God in heaven. I am His child. He has worked in my week in a way which has given me hope. I have come to believe He loves me enough to heal me. I believe God alone will heal me, and He will do so partially through the community of Christian men I have around me. If not now, when?

“Come now, and let us reason together,” Says the LORD, “Though your sins are as scarlet, They will be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They will be like wool. – Isaiah 1:18

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