Today was a good day. I am realizing it seems everything is triggering feelings of shame though. It doesn’t matter what it is – positive or negative; I feel shame rise on the inside. I am doing so much better and at the same time shame is suddenly rampant. Whether someone has just told me they love me or if someone has just held me accountable, I feel shame. Someone could question the most mundane little thing, and up pops its ugly head.
I know what the trigger is, I think. I am so thankful I am at the point in my journey to deal with this, but dealing with this is hard. Recovery never seems to be a straight-forward thing. I am so grateful to be here and deal with this. But dealing with this makes me feel dirty.
I overcame one major fear today. I overcame one major fear yesterday. I wonder what fear I could conquer tomorrow?
What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If our God is for us, who can be against us? – Romans 8:31
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