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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

Grace: sin, baby, sin!

I’d say I really couldn’t believe my eyes; but at this point in my spiritual walk, I have come to expect the unexpected. Yup, right there in writing a pastor was challenging me to go out and sin as much as I could for one day. I knew I couldn’t do it. No matter how good his intentions were, I just couldn’t.

The wages of sin is always death, and I had no desire to reap any more death. I didn’t want to go back there. Even with the encouragement of a man I trusted, I never wanted to open the door to the gnawing pain of my addictive behaviors (habitual sins). It would take me tearing my eyes off Jesus in order to walk away from Him. When I took Him away as my source of fulfillment, then it would be easy to begin filling the hole with sin. My neediness would drive me to it. It would consume me, and my life would once again be empty.

But just because I have been able to kill some of the desires of my sinful nature doesn’t mean I don’t have habitual sin in my life. Take for instance my bitterness.

Further instructions for the day of sin included choosing a sin with which I particularly struggled and then doing it as much as I could. Well, if you have been reading this lately, it takes you about the same amount of time as me to figure out which sin I should choose.

Bitterness. I could be bitter as much as I wanted for a whole day.

And why could I be bitter? Because in Romans 5, the Apostle Paul explains where sin abounds, grace abounds all the more. God wouldn’t be mad if I did it. Sure, there would be natural consequences. I would reap what I would sow, but it wouldn’t make God mad. Jesus’ death had already taken care of how God felt about me. All God’s anger at me had already been dumped on Jesus on the cross. Jesus had already endured the excruciating punishment which I deserved for my sin.

It was done. I am free. I am “in Christ Jesus”; and for those who are in Christ Jesus, where sin abounds, grace abounds all the more!

I giggled a little over the thought of being as bitter as possible for a day. No thanks! Why would I make such a stupid decision. Even from an entirely secular standpoint, what a stupid decision! Even if the situation I was bitter over had the entire world agreeing that my bitterness was justified (which it isn’t), what a stupid decision!

But if I did make the decision, God wouldn’t be mad at me. Not because sin doesn’t make Him mad. It does. He hates pain, death and destruction. But because all His wrath against me was already taken out on Jesus.

I was free, free to sin; and it was a good feeling. I could do whatever I wanted. What did I really want?

I didn’t want more grace. I love receiving grace. I am incredibly grateful God is gracious, but I regret I need so much of it. I regret all those times I took my eyes off Jesus and tried to fill the void in my life with destructive behaviors. Man, I sure did not understand who God was back then. God is love, and His commands are loving. I was so confused.

Grace. I am under grace. I am free to sin as much as I like. Paul goes on to ask if where sin abounds, grace abounds all the more, then why not sin? The answer isn’t that it will make God mad. The answer isn’t that the wages of sin is always death. The answer is because it is not who I am.

Who I was before Christ loved sin; who I am in Christ hates sin. Who I was in the flesh was evil. Who I am in the Spirit is righteous.

Grace. God is not mad. God nailed Jesus to the cross for my sin. God is not mad at me. God is happy. God is ridiculously happy.

Do you believe God is mad at you? Is there a system of laws (man-made or scriptural) that you are trying to keep in order to stay on the good side of God? If you try hard enough, do you think you could become good enough to make it into heaven?


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