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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

Experiencing Emotions

I want to learn how to be in the moment. Not live after the moment, but in it. Over the last week, I feel like this has been happening to me more. I have been pretty emotionally present this week. Sometimes I was terrified. In one instance, pain and vulnerability felt so raw; the best way I can describe it is it felt like I did not have skin. It was not an I felt naked and shameful sort of thing. It was an I felt exposed and out of my element sort of thing. Oddly I do not think I ran from my emotions even in that instance. I definitely avoided communicating with the people whose presence was bringing out this emotion in me, but I allowed the emotion to remain. It feels like progress. I am not sure it looks like it from the outside; but on the inside, it is a step in the right direction.

Other times, I have had to concentrate on not shaking as I washed someone’s counter because suddenly communication and being present in the moment seemed like too much. Another time I felt really, really loved and realized I had someone new I could confide in. Though I did not take immediate advantage of it. Instead we laughed a lot. I laughed a lot this week. Over the most trivial events. It was amazing.

Being present in the moment emotionally has also helped me start admiring the people around me while I am around them. God has made some really cool people.

Tonight was really hard for me. For some reason sharing on open share night is sometimes really hard for me. I feel like so much has happened this week I could not share it all and make it make sense anyway, so I shared very little. I sort of wished I had shared a bit more.

And so it happened just as the Scriptures say: “Abraham believed God, and God counted him as righteous because of his faith.” He was even called the friend of God. – James 2:23

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