This week was full of ups and downs. Today, I spent the better part of the day filled with anxiety. Not going to God at all with my issues, but wallowing. Trying to ignore them while I concentrated on working.
This afternoon I checked Facebook and saw a quote by Tim Keller: The power of the gospel comes in two movements. It first says, “I am more sinful and flawed than I ever dared believe,” but then quickly follows with, “I am more accepted and loved than I ever dared hope.”
It seems to sum up recovery to me. I suppose I shall have to hear it again and again and again. Someday I will fully believe the love thing. It occurred to me later tonight that the gospel message is basically, “But the good news is…”
I rejected God, but the good news is He accepted me. I lived in sin, but the good news is He sent Jesus to rescue me from sin. I wallowed in a miry pit of muck and sin for years, but the good news is He took me out and set my feet upon a Rock. I began to fill the pain in my life with alcohol, porn and masturbation; but the good news is He sent His Son to die for the greatest of sinners. I experience a lot of pain, but the good news is He came to redeem me from my pain. I scorned love, but the good news is He loved me first, patiently and persistently. I sneered at weakness, but the good news is He came as a weak baby so His strength could be made perfect in my weakness.
I spent my morning in anxiety, but my day became better when I took a nap. When I woke up, I just went ahead and had a couple full-blown meltdowns. It was nice to freak out a bit. I feel better now. Open share was good. Turns out I was one vent away from feeling a whole lot better!
Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. – 2 Corinthians 12:9
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