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  • Writer's pictureLaura Kae

As thou has been

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest… great is His faithfulness to me. Today was a little all over the place. I have been able to rein in my emotions a little, but did experience bitter pain this morning. This afternoon was better. My Tuesday night girls make everything better in a heartbeat.

I started out with that line because I just heard that song. He is faithful. I have no idea how He will do in me what needs to be done. As I just wrote that, anger arises in my at the thought of what feels like injustice to me. Anger that I have to experience so much more pain and tears. Anger there is no flip to switch for my life to be better. Sorrow that joy doesn’t come in my mornings, but anger does. Then I have all day to give it to God before it all starts all over again.

I go to counseling in the morning. As desperately as I need it right now, I have no desire to go. There is going to be more pain there. I know it.

I guess one thing about it I always say if you are a Christian and there is no pain in your life you can’t be really following Jesus because He says that means dying and dying is always painful. I mean it sounds like it must be anyway. That and killing the desires of our sinful nature. The combination pretty much sucks.

Our hearts ache, but we always have joy. We are poor, but we give spiritual riches to others. We own nothing, and yet we have everything. – 2 Corinthians 6:10


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